问题标题:
请高手帮忙给雅思作文评分Inpresent-daysociety,itisgenerallybelievedthatmoneythegovermentinvestinsocietywelfarbenefitnumerouspeople.However,atthesametime,controversyhasarisenonwhatthegovernmentoughttoprovidefina
问题描述:

请高手帮忙给雅思作文评分

Inpresent-daysociety,itisgenerallybelievedthatmoneythegovermentinvestinsocietywelfarbenefitnumerouspeople.However,atthesametime,controversyhasarisenonwhatthegovernmentoughttoprovidefinancialaidfor.Somepeopleinsistthatthegovernmentshouldnotputmoneyonbuildingtheatersandsportsstadiums,whilesomeareinfavorofspendingmoremoneyonmedicalcareandeducation.Inmyopinion,theirviewsareoverlysimplistic.

Ontheonehand,itisevidentthattheatersandsportsstadiumscanaffordpeoplemuchentertainmentandpleasure.Obviously,thesefacilitiescangreatlyenrichculturalexperienceofhumanbeings,keepingthemawayfrommonotonouslife.Furthermore,theatersandstadiumsrelaxhumanities’bodiesandeasetheirminds.Aboveall,buildingfacilitiescanpromotethedevelopmentofcultureandphysicalexercise,whichwillgreatlyfurtherthewholesociety.

Ontheotherhand,weshouldacknowledgethatmedicalcareandeducationareessentialinsociety.Thereisnodenying/Weshouldnotdenythattheyplayacriticalroleinourdailylife.Medicalcarebecameindemandwhenthehumanracesuffersfromthediseases.Alsopeoplehaverighttoreceiveeducation,foritnotonlyraisespeople’sawarenessbutalsobroadenstheirhorizons.Moreover,itcontributestohuman'screativitybyenhancingpeople'sknowledge.Therefore,thegovernmentisresponsibleforthese.

Toconclude,Iwouldsaythatthetwoopinionshavebothadvantages.Ifirmlybelievethatdevelopallofthesecanbringsusgreatbenefits.Therefore,weshouldsupportthesemeasuresofthegovernment,whichadaptstothecontemporarytimes.

汪晓海回答:
  我接触雅思到现在四年了.没能看到材料和要求,颇难判断.不过你的作文错误很少,也很流畅,据我的经验,至少有6.5分吧.要再进一步的话,用词方面得再注意些,用一些更能出彩的词.加油
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