问题标题:
英语修改Inrecentyears,anincreasingnumberofstudentschoosetostudyoverseas.Asthedomesticeducationcannotmeettheirgreatdemands,theytendtostepoutoftheircountriestotakealookattheoutsidesworld,widentheirhorizonsandg
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英语修改

Inrecentyears,anincreasingnumberofstudentschoosetostudyoverseas.Asthedomesticeducationcannotmeettheirgreatdemands,theytendtostepoutoftheircountriestotakealookattheoutsidesworld,widentheirhorizonsandgetthebettereducation.However,therearemanychallengesfortheinternationalstudents,especiallyadjustingtoanewacademicculture.

Oneofthemajorproblemsfortheinternationalstudentsisthatthedifferentthinkingstyle.ThataChinesestudentwhohadagoodachievementinChinabutfailedhisessayintheUKwouldbetakenagoodexample.Inhisessay,heintroducedmanydetailsabouthispersonalexperienceandpersonalpointsofview.However,therewasnoobjectiveexamples.Whatismore,hisconclusionwassobriefthattherewasnocommentinhisessay.Obviously,heinsistedhisessaywithhisoldChinesethinkingstyle.Therefore,hisessaywasnotacceptable.Accordingtothetypicalexample,someavailablemethodswouldbetakentosolvetheproblemforallinternationalstudents.Firstly,theinternationalstudentsshouldmakeeffortstochangetheiroldthinkingstyletoadjusttothenewacademicthinkingstyle,toconsiderandstudymorenewthinkingstyles.Thentheyshouldseekhelpfromtutorswhocouldgivethemappropriateandcustom-builtsuggestionsandadvice.

Theotherproblemfortheinternationalstudentsisthedifferenceofactionstyle.Forsomeinternationalstudents,theyrespecttheirteachersandalwayskeepdistancefromtheirteachers.Whenfacingsomeproblems,theyprefertokeepsilencethanaskingquestionseventheydonotunderstand.Therefore,studentswouldpileupmoreandmorequestions.Thatnotbeshy,morecommunicationsandaskingquestionswouldbethevaliditysolutionforinternationalstudents.

Allinall,iftheinternationalstudentswanttoovercomethetwoproblems:differenceofthinkingandactionstyles,theyshouldchangetheiroldthinkingstyeandremembertoaskahelpfromteachersorfriends.Therewouldbeapromisingfuturetowaitinternationalstudents.

李霄飞回答:
  还是挺流畅的,不过注意检查以下几点:   1.internationalstudents前不用加the,因为你是泛指国际学生,而不是特指.   2.注意一些句子里的单复数,比如第二段的第四句.当然还有些语法的细节.   3.internationalstudents是否范围太大,你的例子都是中国学生的现象.据我了解中东南美和欧洲的学生都是很热情的,亚洲学生也是中国学生比较含蓄.   4.这类文章一般3个论点比较好,你还可以加一个,比如说对图书馆和电脑的运用.   5.therebe的句型太多,建议换种说法.比如说,hisconclusionwassobriefthattherewasnocommentinhisessay.可以说成hisconclusionwassobriefandwithoutanycommentsinhisessay.
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