问题标题:
请英语高手帮我点评一下我的这篇英语四级作文,不甚感激.1:各大学开设了各种各样的选修课2:学生因为各种原因选择了不同的选修课3:以你自己为例.Whatelectivestochoose?Nowdifferentkindsofe
问题描述:

请英语高手帮我点评一下我的这篇英语四级作文,不甚感激.

1:各大学开设了各种各样的选修课

2:学生因为各种原因选择了不同的选修课

3:以你自己为例.

Whatelectivestochoose?

Nowdifferentkindsofelectivesareopenedtothecollegestudentsinmanyuniversity.Theysaytheelectiveswillexpandthestudents'viewandenrichtheirlife.

Differentstudentshavedifferentchoice.Somestudentsselectaclassoftaijiquan.Theythinkthattaijiquanisourtraditionalcreamandithavemagicpowertoattracttheytochoose.Inaddition,learningtaijiquanwillmaketheirhealthbetter.Andotherstudentslikeaclassofenvironmentinourlife.Theyholdthatenvironmentinourworldisgettingmoreandmoreworseandweshouldlearnsomethingtoprotectit.Moreover,todaymanystoresarearoundtheirschoolalwaysusegreatmanyofplasticbagsandboxes.

Formypart,IlikethecultureofChaoshan,soIselectaclassofChaoju.Theteacherinourclassisveryinterestingandhumor.Hisclassisrelaxed.Importantly,IcanlearnsomethingaboutthedevelopmentofChaojuandaskillofplay.Insum,itisagoodchoiceforme.

刘琚回答:
  建议你注意用词和语法,比如单复数问题,你里面有很多语法错误,比如moreandmoreworse,worse已是比较级,所以不要再用more,直接用worseandworse就可以了,注意你的连接词,比如最后一段,importantly,应用mostimportantly,insum应改为tosumup.总之,你最好多看些范文并背一些固定句型和转折词.另外你最好分三段或四段些,即introduction--body--conclusion.
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